Battle Lost, War Won

Time for a long-overdue update on Marjah, and not one that’s 100% full of good news.
Since April, Marjah settled in nicely here in San Antonio. Spring and early summer meant trips to the dog park and/or a Jeep ride somewhere almost daily. She became a regular visitor when I was attending classes or training with my wounded veteran teammates – even in a few of my college classes – as well as down at the pub every week to watch the Arsenal match with a big group of friends. She made friends everywhere, and even though occasionally a bartender or server at the pub may have forgotten my name, EVERYONE knew Marjah. She got to ride with me on road trips to Austin, New Orleans, and Fredericksburg, and once even went to a wake with me, putting grins on some people’s faces and cheering some folks up for a moment during an otherwise really tough day. She went with me to soccer practice once or twice, and got to see some deer up close for the first time in her life. In June, she came with me and some of my friends on a 5K “Hike for the 22” at the Alamo, and didn’t even slow down until the last couple of blocks. She inspired lots of folks in the crowd that day!

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Unfortunately, towards the middle of July when she only had one more round of chemo left, her Lymphoma came back. We tried one more round with a different medication, but it had no effect. By the beginning of August, her lymph nodes had swollen so much that she started losing her appetite. Last week, in addition to the weight loss, it began to affect her airway.
Sunday morning was the first match of the season for Arsenal, with a 7:30 kickoff. As I got up, made coffee and got dressed, I looked over at Marjah in her bed. She was awake, but just watching me, not following me and wagging her tail as usual. Just as I was wondering whether or not I should take her to the match with me, she gave me The Look.
Some of you have seen it, you know exactly what I’m talking about.
I decided if I had to think about whether or not to take her, I’d better do it while she was still able to come along with me. I strapped her into the passenger seat of the Jeep, and we headed to the pub, her ears flapping in the wind, no top, no doors.
Without trying to upset anyone or spoil the morning, I quietly made it known that this would probably be her last visit. It became pretty clear very quickly that all of our friends and the staff at the pub are animal lovers. It probably was best that the scoreline of the game had ruined the mood already. We made the rounds and everyone got some time to pet on Marjah, a few even tearing up a bit and telling her goodbye. The manager loved on her for a while, and brought her some bacon strips from the kitchen. That was the first she’d eaten in about four days, and really not bad at all for a final meal.
Monday morning, I made the call and set an appointment with the vet. Thankfully, there was an opening in the afternoon. I staggered through work until lunchtime, then took the rest of the day off. I spent as much time as I could with Marjah before the appointment and cried for the first time in about ten years. I left her resting on my bed and went to the vet’s office, located about 100 yards away.
Less than an hour later, I returned with our veterinarian and her assistant. Loyal to the end, Marjah got up, alerted, and barked her little yappy danger bark when she saw strangers in the house. She hadn’t noticed until they were in the bedroom with us, and I knew she’d lost some of her awareness in the last day or two. It was time.
The doctor talked me through the process, and I was able to hold Marjah’s head in my hands and know she was relaxed and calm when she went. A thought crossed my mind, and the doctor had no objections when I asked… so I was able to give Marjah one last Jeep ride in the sun as we went back to the vet’s office.

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Of the hundred or more people who have reached out since to offer me their support, probably 80 or 90 have actually met Marjah, played with her, and spent time with her at some point in the last four and a half years. That’s just the folks I know about, too. There are probably many others who were touched by Marjah that I’ll never even know about.
I can honestly say, having had her since she was born, that she never suffered a day of her life. I wasn’t going to let that start now, and we got to part ways on our own terms, with her just as loving to everyone as she’d ever been. One of my best friends told me yesterday that “Whoever coined the phrase ‘a dog’s life’ wasn’t talking about our dogs.” Truth there, to be sure.
Marjah can never be replaced, but pretty soon I will get to be a hero for another dog. One local rescue shelter here has about 30-50 at-risk dogs available for adoption every single day. I’m pretty sure I can make the connection once again in a crowd that size. A dog who is every bit as deserving of my love and care for life is already out there – I just have to go find it. I can’t save every abused or neglected animal in the world, but I’m sure as hell gonna save one more.
For now, this blog will become a sort of retrospective memorial and I will post pictures and stories occasionally. I do that as sincere thanks to all of you who have offered kind comments and words of support and encouragement over the years. I thank you, and even though you may not have even met Marjah she touched your lives, too. That’s the kind of power she had over the hearts of others, and I’m honored we all got the chance to see it for a while.

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Author: echo6delta

Semi-retired in South Texas.

8 thoughts on “Battle Lost, War Won”

  1. “I can’t save every abused or neglected animal in the world, but I’m sure as hell gonna save one more”

    Love this. Run free Marjah, the bridge is beaming with hero’s.

  2. What a special tribute to a very special and very loved dog! As sad as this is to read, I couldn’t help but smile through the tears at how Marjah touched so many lives!

    She certainly touched ours here at Tripawds! What a Goodwill Ambassador for us! Way to represent Marjah! Such an inspiration on so many levels.

    The love story…the bond you two shared…the “best friend” camaraderie…you two were…and still are ..a TEAM! You two shared a very special bond and that was evident in every single post.

    The void you are facing will be one of the toughest things you will ever face. The day in and day out routines with Marjah, the intensity of caring for a tripawd and watching over her, all that loss will feel almost unbearable.

    You gave her the selfless and loving gift of release when she needed it. She tknew she could cou t on you just loke she had every single day of her joyfully blissful love with you. She lived her lofe as a Champ and she went back home as a Champ…on her terms…surrounded by the human who showed her what love and happiness felt like!

    Just as younfelt privileged to have Marjah in your life, she felt just as privileged to have you in hers! Nothing can take that bond away!

    You’ll never replace Marjah, because she has never really left you. She is with you in your heart snd nestled safely in yiur Soul, wagging her tail nonstop. Yes, you will love another dog and show them how great life can be…and that’s what Marjah wants! In fact, I bet she already has someone picked out for you! Who knows…may even be a tripawd!!

    Marjah has a legacy of hope and determination and courage. I do hope you will continue to tell Marjah’s life affirming story to anyo e starting this journey. She really js2 quite the little miracle dog!

    I sincerely want to thank you for sharing your adventures with Marjah with us! She is clearly a dog who has made…and will continue to make…a differe ce in the lives of so many! This little dog lived a life of purpose and meaning! She will never be forgotten here!

    When you can, PLEASE share more about Marjah’s adventure filled life…WITH lictures of course! She takes THE cutest pictures! ADORABLE!!

    The thousands of happy memories will soon help push the grief I tonthe background. That’s what Marjah wa ts you to remember…that’s what she remembers!

    Holding you in our hearts

    Sally and My Eternal Light Happy Hannah and Merry Myrtle

  3. Marjah, there are so many ways that you impacted this community and touched every one of us. It saddens us tremendously to know that you got your angel wings, as I’m sure many, many other people out there. The way you touched so many is a gift that we will be forever grateful for, because you and your dad really did make this world a better place. What a beautiful legacy, one that will always be honored and remembered.

    Jared, your story of Marjah and the adventures you shared are truly one in a million. We can’t thank you enough for inviting us into your lives. All of us are heartbroken, it’s a very sad time. But know that you are always, always welcome here and we hope to get updates from you to see what other wonderful things you’ve done in this world with the future critters who are so fortunate to have you looking out for them. Thank you for your service, for loving Marjah and every furball out there. xoxo

  4. Thank you for sharing this beautifully touching story, and pics with us, your sweet Marjah will leave a trail of tears, (like mine right now) but also amazing memories of the wonderful life filled with adventures and joy…….The love you gave her and shared, will live on within your heart always…. She will never be forgotten.
    And yes, she will make sure a new pup love will come to you when the time is right…..
    Keeping you in my thoughts and hoping your heart will always be filled with those joyful memories of your sweet little girl…..

    Bonnie, Angel Polly, and new pups

  5. And one more thing, I am so sorry for forgetting this important message…. Thank you so much for your service to our country, and also being there for the wounded warriors of our great country, may God bless you……

  6. I’m so sorry for your loss of sweet Marjah. She looks totally adorable in your pictures and I know she will be truly missed by you and all those that knew her well.

    What you said about not being able to save all abused dogs but you sure can still save one reminded of a saying on a drink coaster I have.

    “Saving one dog will not change the world, but for that one dog the world will be forever changed.”

    That saying is so true and I found it helpful when we had to let our Leland go. My husband and I still had so much love to give another fur baby that we opened our home and hearts to our Lucian. Providing a loving home to an animal is a precious gift that we can give.

    I have no doubt that Marjah is working her magic and will have you crossing paths with your future fur baby.

    Sahana and her Angel Leland and Lucian too

  7. I am so sorry to hear about Marjah. What a lovely tribute to her. It brought tears to my eyes. I love the quote you said that everyone else is mentioning. That next baby will be greatly loved.

    Michelle & Angel Sassy , Bosch, Snickers & Jasmine

  8. I am so sorry to hear that Marjah has crossed the Bridge. You must have a hole in your heart about a mile wide right about now. I am so glad you will be bringing a rescue dog into your life one day soon. That will be one very very lucky pup!

    Thank you so much for sharing Marjah’s story with us. She was a little dog with a lion’s heart. The work you two did together with wounded warriors is beyond awesome. I will never forget the photo of the young man down on the floor with her.

    It is obvious that you have a huge heart too, and I know you will continue your good work. I have the feeling that the pup Marjah sends your way will be therapy dog material too 😉

    xoxo,
    Martha, Codie Rae, and the Oaktown Pack

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